Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness” (Jas. 1:2–3).

This is the very first thing James writes after his greeting. I believe this is for a very important reason. Many Christians today forget about the importance of joy during a trial. One of the hardest lessons we Christians have to learn is how to be joyful in the midst of pain and suffering.

My mom was diagnosed with cancer for the second time (the first time being in 2016). This time was different. We were told it was stage four cancer and that she had approximately three to six months to live.

I felt the world crumble in the weeks that followed. It was easy to fake a brave face and say, “Everything happens for a reason; the Lord’s got this!” when deep down I was filled with sorrow, fear, and despair. My thoughts consisted of, Why us? How can I count this trial as joy when it hurts this bad? Every dream I had with or for my mom, I felt was being stripped away from me.

Joy is a choice, though it is sometimes extremely hard to choose joy. Here are two practical ways I found during our trial that helped, and continue to help me daily, to count it as joy.

First, thank God for your trials. This was one of the hardest things for me. In our family worship, we all pray. We had family worship soon after we were given my mom’s diagnosis. My mom had told us that, if we could, we should thank God for the trial we were in. How could I thank God for taking my mom from me? How could I thank God for the pain and the fear of the future my family was going through? It felt impossible to thank God for this.

Instead of thanking God for the trial as a whole, I began thanking God for the good things that came out of the trial. I began thanking God for the promises He’s made to us. Along the way, thankfulness for the trial as a whole formed, and joy began to come through that. The decision to focus on God and His faithfulness through the trial changed my perspective.

Second, surround yourself with godly people and healthy activities. My world rapidly began changing after that diagnosis. Satan crept in very quickly and began making me feel guilty for continuing in my extracurricular and fun outings. I began to feel like a terrible daughter for doing fun things while my mom was just given months to live. I stopped working, and often declined hanging out with friends because of this guilt.

I found out the hard way this contributed to draining every ounce of joy I had. Not only was I skipping out on things I loved doing, I was allowing all my thoughts to be on what I was losing, all because of guilt. I began to realize the Lord places people (the church) to help you through the hardest times of your life, so when you can’t stand they can hold you up. Once I put that guilt behind me and spent time with other believers, doing fun activities, I was reminded of how much we have to be thankful for. Even in our darkest moments, joy can be found there.

Consider what you are going through as a matter of joy, not because the thing itself is enjoyable, but because our trials produce steadfastness and the fruit of the Spirit in us. There is at least one good thing happening to us in the midst of the pain and suffering. We are called to think about our trials in that way. God has a purpose, and that purpose is always perfectly good. We can count our trials as joy because God is working in every situation, even our most painful moments. If God used the greatest suffering—Jesus being crucified on the cross—for the greatest good, what makes you think He can’t do that for you?