“The wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy” (Jas. 3:17, MEV).

Several years ago a commercial for a company named Esurance made me laugh.¹ Beatrice, an “Offline Over-sharer,” seats two friends in her living room to share pictures of her vacation posted to her living room wall. She quips, “I’m saving a ton of time by posting them to my wall.”

“Oo! I like that one!” says one friend.

Beatrice replies excitedly, “It’s so quick, just like my car insurance!” She then tells how much money she saved while using the tagline of a competing insurance company.

“I saved more than that in half the time!” says the other friend.

A disgruntled Beatrice declares, “I unfriend you.”

The frustrated friend rises with the now oft-repeated line, “That’s not how it works! That’s not how any of this works!”

How right Beatrice’s friend is, not just of Beatrice’s attempt to parlay online actions to the “real world,” but of the real world itself.

There are always a number of social media holdouts. For those people, when tweets and posts or likes and shares are mentioned, eyes glaze over. But most of us have bought in. We crave the connection, like the praise, and enjoy observing the lives and adventures of those we care about and miss. However, we quickly forget the underbelly of social media. Great good has come from these platforms, but their growing size casts darkening shadows. Their intrusiveness exposes the shadows in our hearts.

The shadows produced and provoked by social media should not surprise us Christians. When Sophocles reminded us that “nothing vast enters the life of mortals without a curse,” he could have very well been talking about the virtual playgrounds on which we increasingly, obsessively spend our days, as well as talking about our sinful hearts that lead us in playing there.

Armed with our Christian theology, we should better understand the digital environs that alter our world and our own behavior. We, as Christians, must develop a certain savvy that wasn’t necessary in previous generations if we are to navigate these digital waters in Christ-honoring ways. I’m not here as a Luddite, telling you to avoid social media. My desire is to encourage you to avoid entrapment, addiction, wrong priorities, and slippery slopes disguised as carnival fun slides.

Depravity on Display

Nothing is as it was intended to be in this life. Seeking to be like God, we became devils, introducing the great darkness of the sin that is manifest in every part of the fallen human nature and every invention of man.

This lack of neutrality is where social media starts. Platforms and algorithms that bring humans together also prey on their desires, pride, arrogance, fear, and brokenness. Consider a single room where three billion sinners are directly networking, connecting, sharing, interacting, critiquing, messaging, posting, and responding. This is mingling with massive implications.

Distracted Living

This article will take the average American adult, who can read around 200 words per minute, about eight minutes to read. The time it takes you to read it could expose your addiction to social media. How many times will you check your phone in the next eight minutes? One study found that one in ten folks surveyed checked their phone every four minutes. Can you read this entire article without checking your phone?

We all know that by phone I mean smartphone. And smartphone implies access to Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, WhatsApp, email, etc. While Psalm 119 calls us to meditate all the day on God’s perfect Word, Silicon Valley now beckons us to endlessly ponder data dumps of unavoidable comparisons between our supposed flaws and everyone else’s purported perfections, from the moment our eyes open until the end of each day.

The Downward Effects of the Social In Media

Being constantly bombarded by images and summaries of the exquisite meal, the hassle-free road trip, or the tantalizing new remodel of our friends, family, or faraway strangers takes its toll on how we view ourselves and our own providential situations. This is particularly striking for young people, who lack emotional and spiritual maturity. Medical and psychological institutions and organizations are finding greater connections between social media use and emotional and relational problems in preteens and teens, like depression or even suicide.[^fn-2_footnote] If you anticipate affirmation when you put yourself out there and get nothing or, worse, derogatory reactions, the hurt is no longer virtual.

Self In/Self Out

More and more people seem to think that Google, Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram magically know what they want and start pumping out strangely relevant ads. Arthur Clarke would remind us that it is merely a “sufficiently advanced technology,” not magic. The technology is becoming significantly more advanced each year. Social media’s life verse is 1 Corinthians 4:7b: “What do you have that you did not receive?” Nothing that is put out to you is something that has not already, by even the slightest action, been put in by you. The artificial intelligence of social media algorithms takes your length of gaze at a friend’s picture, liked events, joined groups, and geographic locations of posts and then curates individualized online experiences tweaked just for you, drawing you further and further into the rabbit hole.² Isolation, alienation, and polarization in our nation and churches, among family and friends, is the fruit of an advertiser’s dream come true. One’s online experience is not a common reality that everyone else experiences. Rather, it is a solitary bubble of desire and confirmation bias that reinforces what one already tends to believe to be true.

Despotic Demagogues in Dialogue

The self-oriented nature of social media can lead us to interact in hateful and hurtful ways with those we normally would not if we were speaking with them IRL (in real life). Frankly, the online environment breeds sinful conversation. If one of our goals is to spread biblical wisdom, then we are to use social media as a tool to do so.

Let us remind ourselves that “the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy.” Does James 3:17 describe your online behavior? Does this characterize the way your online heroes relate to others? Do you practice virtual wisdom? Online banter quickly mimics others. Be sure to mimic Jesus, not those who claim Him but deny His love and grace by their words.

Take the veil of anonymity, add the perceived ability to delete (but remember: nothing is ever really deleted from the internet) and the comfort of only being “Facebook friends,” multiply that by the affirmation of a theological echo chamber, and take that to the power of no immediate social consequences for one’s behavior. You have the formula for sinful disaster. Exaggerated claims, falsified reports, even direct, outspoken, doubled-down-on lies swirl about the walls and feeds of the strictest of believers. IRL, you would never consider these sins to be acceptable. Yet the temptation is strong to justify such actions in order to win the war on your wall, while losing your soul in the process.

What to Say Online?

When online, you have the opportunity to procure and propagate true wisdom and biblical love. Let your online words be marked by James’ very description of that wisdom that comes only from above. To practice virtual wisdom, try answering these questions, based on James 3:17, before you interact on social media:

Pure. Is what I’m about to post pure in such a way that it does not just avoid filth and sensuality but also upholds Scripture’s standards for truth and truth telling? Do I know enough about the truth of this person or situation to create this post or make this comment?

Peaceable. Even if I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that this is true, am I saying it with words and a tone that will create or keep peace, so that others might rightly consider what I am saying and not be dragged down by how I am saying it? Is what and how I’m about to speak going to encourage brothers and sisters in Christ to maintain unity in the bond of peace?

Gentle. Am I showing that, as Paul tells us in Titus 3, I have received kindness from the Lord and so am now able to be biblically gentle with others?

Open to Reason. Am I so immersed in this issue on social media that I am unable to see reality and be reasonable with those who disagree with me? Do I really understand enough of this issue that I am able to convey biblical truth to those around me and seek to lovingly convince them of the truth? Am I willing to consider that I am wrong on one point or the whole issue and be convinced of that?

Full of Mercy and Good Fruits. Are my words and tone expressing the same mercy to those around me as I would desire to have? Will the mercy I show draw out the best in others or lead them into darkness?

Without Partiality. Do I measure the truth by what is being said or who is saying it? Do I give passes to sin and error because I like the one posting? Am I about to sin against a faithful brother or sister, because I don’t like what they said?

Without Hypocrisy. If this person were right in front of me, would I say what I am about to post in these words or in this way? Am I reflecting the image of Christ and His righteousness in this interaction?

This list isn’t a fix-all, neither is it completely comprehensive. However, if you have struggled to be godly in your social media interactions, asking yourself these questions might help. As this world is already not as it should be, righteousness and redemption should flow from our keyboards, not foolish talk and harassment. If we wisely apply James 3:17 online, then verse 18 will surely follow: “And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.” As you interact on social media, sow the fruit of righteousness as you make peace, and you will be virtually wise.

Joel Wood pastors Trinity (Burtonsville, Md.) RPC, counsels and teaches as a Fellow-in-Training of the Association of Certified Biblical Counselors, and is 1/4 of the Jerusalem Chamber podcast, but, more importantly, is husband to Emily and father to their 5 children. He holds MDiv and DMin degrees from the Reformed Presbyterian Theological Seminary.