I grew up in both Roman Catholic and mainline Presbyterian churches, because my parents divorced when I was very young. I attended both churches in my youth, and I enjoyed going to church with my family. I taught the preschool Sunday school class at my dad’s Presbyterian church, and I attended Sunday school myself in the Catholic church.

Roman Catholicism became particularly influential in my life, and I was confirmed in the church and attended regularly. Faith was very important to me until I left my parents’ homes for college. I started thinking more for myself and began questioning the impact religion and faith had on my life. I also began to sense the shallowness of the beliefs and the groundlessness of the traditions of the Roman Catholic church.

In college, I attended a youth group meeting with my roommate at her Wesleyan church. There I entered my first in-depth discussion about God and who He truly is. I walked away from that meeting lost and angry. It felt like they were talking about a different God than the God I knew. I thought I didn’t know who God even was anymore. Was there even a God to know? I was confused and hurt. In my naïve youth, I had thought as long as you believed in God, it didn’t matter who you associated yourself with. The thought had never crossed my mind that different denominations, all claiming to be Christian, portrayed God differently from one another. I no longer knew what to believe or where to turn for answers.

I stopped attending church. For a little over a year I struggled with the thought of God and religion and what to believe.

When I met my future husband in July 2012, my life changed. Matt, already a believing Christian, started talking to me about Jesus Christ. The more Matt and I talked about the things of God, the more I struggled. Jesus died to save me? Why me? I didn’t deserve to be forgiven. Why did God choose me and not others? What about my family? These thoughts ran through my head like water. I cried. I questioned. And then I began to pray.

Matt and I started reading devotions together and reading the Bible. That was a very special time for me. I had many questions that Matt would patiently answer, and we would look up answers in the Bible together. I remember one day as we read through a particularly convicting devotion, I sobbed because I realized I was a sinner, and that my sins were what had put Jesus on the cross. I understood that Jesus had suffered because of me. But that alone did not lead to my conversion.

I started going to Messiah’s Church RPC with Matt and his family. There I was blessed by the clear and articulate preaching of God’s Word. I had never before attended a church service that revolved so much around the Word of God. Even the music was the true Word of God! Singing the Psalms a cappella moved me. It was the purest, truest form of worship I had ever heard and experienced.

Messiah’s Church RPC was also the first place I heard the gospel preached. I heard the story of Jesus’ life, death, and resurrection in the Roman Catholic Church, and its importance to the Christian faith, but never had I heard the basis for Christianity and its true impact on every believer’s life. Finally, I understood what really happened, why it happened, and for whom it happened.

Not long after I began attending church with Matt, we started to meet with our pastor, Brian Coombs. We read Scripture passages and discussed doctrine in greater detail. He patiently worked through all of these things, more than once, each and every week for several months. The more I learned, the more I understood and the closer I came to believing.

I was still struggling with the feeling that I didn’t deserve to be saved, and yet I knew I was called to believe. One evening, when I was sitting and reading my Bible, I finally realized it wasn’t about me; it was about God. Even my call to have faith was grounded in the ultimate purpose of glorifying Him. One passage of Scripture that is especially important to me in my salvation is John 14:1-6. Thomas asked Jesus, “Lord, we do not know where you are going, how can we know the way?” I realized that was the question I had in my heart. How do I know what to do? How do I know what to believe? And Jesus gives the answer. He is the way.

Believe on Him, and everything will fall into place. That isn’t to say everything will be perfect—there will always be struggles. But there will always be God, and He is greater than all. The moment I realized this, I believed. I cried out to God for forgiveness, and I repented of my sins.

A short time after I believed, I became a member of the RP Church. I continue to grow in Christ with the support and love of my husband, family, and church family. I am blessed every day by the grace and mercy of God.

—By Cassy Pikarsky

Cassy is an oncology nurse at Crouse Hospital and lives in Syracuse, N.Y. She and her husband, Matt, attend Messiah’s Church (Clay, N.Y.) RPC.